"Gold Is the Color of Elephant Pee": Spirit Day at National Cathedral School

Spirit Day, as a student described it in The Exchanged, the school's student publication, in 2021, begins at eight in the morning on a random Friday in September with a dining hall full of teenage girls in purple and gold screaming "Party in the USA." Face glitter, bead necklaces, wigs, bodysuits, the occasional huge inflatable costume. By the end of the first song, half the crowd has lost its voice.

I lose my voice at eight in the morning too, but it's from asking whether anyone has seen my keys.

Then a scavenger hunt in tutus, up and down the staircases and across the front lawn, where teams spell words with their bodies. Then the main event: the scream-off across Woodley Road. Each team takes one side of the street and screams chants at the other. The student writer, with great restraint, describes these as "nuanced and complex ideas," and supplies two.

"G-O-L-D THAT'S HOW WE SPELL VICTORY."

It is not how you spell victory. That is not the point.

And the response from the other sidewalk: "PURPLE'S THE COLOR OF ROYALTY, GOLD IS THE COLOR OF ELEPHANT PEE."

After that, the Upper School crams into the gym to watch the team captains make an entrance, by hoverboard, by unicycle, by some new method every year. Then forty-five more minutes of screaming. Then the student's favorite part: shaving-cream Twister and musical chairs, with chairs flying into the turf and hoarded cans of shaving cream pointed like weapons. Then homeroom skits, a talent show, and the senior video revealing the year's theme.

We tried this at home, in a reduced format. I proposed teams for the Saturday chores, Purple and Gold. The youngest chose Gold and stood on the front step. The middle one chose Purple and stood on the back step. Neither did any chores. The neighbors heard the elephant line twice before my wife came out with the recycling.

The team color, I am told, is for life. I asked my wife which one I'd be. She said I had already been assigned, and that I was a Purple. I asked how she knew. She said, "Royalty," and handed me the recycling.